Wednesday, February 15, 2012
Not Your Typical Day at the Office
One week ago today, at about this time, my world was turned a bit upside down. Now before you go all worse case scenario, everyone is alive and well. Our house is standing, our puppies are healthy, and we're still married. So I've got that going for me (or so I keep reminding myself).
Quite unexpectantly, I was let go from my job. A job that I was very good at. A job that challenged me in the best, and occasionally the worst, of ways. A job that I enjoyed.
Impromptu meetings with your boss happen, but they don't frequently happen with HR. That's never a good sign. Even so, I knew I was an asset to the team, so I still wasn't overly concerned when HR walked in. "We're looking to make some changes." Ok, notebook open, I'm all ears. Except in this case "changes" was code for "you don't work here any more." Say what? I couldn't even tell you the generic you-don't-work-here-anymore statement that came next. Could my boss give any insight on the situation? Could he provide feedback or opportunities for growth and improvement? No. My mind was blown. All the while I sat there stupidly smiling and nodding, attempting to digest this completely out of the blue news. Effective immediately. HR blah blah blah.
And then I left. And I cried and swore and cried some more.
When it comes down to it I could air a lot of dirty laundry here. I could point fingers and name names. I could gossip and grandstand and politic. But I am better than the politics that put me in this situation. Yes, it was politics, not performance, that landed me here. That I am sure. Knowing this is both a reassuring and infuriating. Being in a relatively small city, in a niche market, how far will these politics reach? It's hard to say.
So what now? What about the desperately needed home improvements? Or the finishing of the basement? What about the new car we had been saving for? What about the vacations planned for the year or races I planned to travel to? What about the new home we had been hoping to buy in the next few years? How am I doing to pay my bills in the coming weeks, or worse case scenario, months?
The truth of the matter is that I don't have a parental safety net to scoop me up and make everything ok. No one is going to buy me a house, or pay my mortgage. No one is going to create a job for me or pay my bills.
I am an adult. I am independent. I am hardworking and believe in earning what I have. I wouldn't have it any other way. I've never chosen the easy route or expected a handout, and I don't now. All I can do is pick myself up, shake it off, and get myself back out there. I've had a few interviews, some great conversations, and a few leads. I'll come out of this on top, and I'll have earned every bit of it.
And that is something that I am proud of.